A multimedia presentation.

Sometimes fiction gets it right.

For fun, yet with serious intent, I present the following:

 

One should learn from the Star Wars character Han Solo.

In my continuing desire to help in an area where I’d never received any (until recently), I present a visual accompanied by a breakdown:

Pay attention to:

1} His body language – notice the swagger and relaxed posture when he enters the room. It’s confident and demonstrates that he makes himself at home wherever he is. Also notice the turn-away when Leia starts complaining. It says ‘I have no desire to listen to fears’. Which leads to…

2} His actions – he touches her non-sexually. He places his hands on her shoulders and kisses her forehead. All are reassuring physical gestures. Humans, but women especially, are very tactile creatures (this is also why the vast majority of long distance relationships don’t work. Women often need to feel a man’s physical presence to make him real).

3} His words – he doesn’t invalidate her feelings but he does not cater to them, either. He reassures her as he knows that’s what she really wants; to feel safe and secure, not given cold logic. Also, notice he agrees with her but only to a point. He maintains his friendship and his way of doing things. A man’s confidence is an aura from which women derive comfort.

4} His replies – the answer to Leia’s question is silence. Women are attracted to men who have other options. Women, as the sexual choosers, know that they can get a partner easily – but a quality partner is difficult to attain (this is also why the “slut/stud” comparison is not a double standard in reality). The answer to Lando’s question is simple denial that anything is wrong – and he’s not lying. It’s a machine, he has a very technically proficient friend so it will be repaired. He has faith in himself, his choices and his way of doing things.

There you have it.

Special Note: Take a look at Han’s reaction to Lando’s “total nice guy” game. He seems as though he’s covering his mouth to stifle a laugh. Han was probably much like myself at one point and learned (though much earlier than I did) that it never works. Ever.

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