“I don’t need a reason why…”

 

There’s an old saying that goes:

“The clothes make the man.”

 

 

That’s not at all True.

But women believe, and behave, as though it is.

See, even average looking girls are approached numerous times a day.

So they use as many easily observable characteristics as possible to make quicken and simplify the selection process.

What it took me way too long to figure out (for which, once more, I blame my mother) is:

If a man wants a certain type of woman he needs to dress as though he’s her type of mate.

This seems basic (and it is) but it’s staggering how many guys don’t get it.

 

 

If you want Goth girls, you’ve got to dress Goth.

If you want fashionable girls, dress in the latest styles.

If you want country girls, dress country.

Silly to say it, but in this day and age, it needs to be said.

 

 

As far as grooming goes:

1} Hygiene above all.

2} If you want a mustache, there’s a great deal that must go with it; it must be full, thick and end where the lower lip begins. Also, your hair must be cut short at the sides and back (though not buzz–cut) while being longer (2-3”) on the top and combed back. You should also be about 30 or older, and generally dress professionally/business casually. Also, you must be clean-shaven, otherwise; no 5 o’clock shadow. Be sure your clothes are classic, if not in-style, so as to not be a used car salesman. Lastly, and most importantly, you must go all-in with it. Ignore comments mocking it or asking you to shave. Do not try to win approval for it. Prove you are wearing it for you and will not be around people that want you to change it. That’s how Tom Selleck does it.

2} Goatees = are worn and tired. However, if you’re balding badly and have a weak chin, absolutely grow one. Again, you must be clean-shaven, otherwise; no 5 o’clock shadow. Your head should also be shaved very, very regularly and thoroughly. Be sure to use sunscreen all over your head and be sure to get plenty of sun year ’round, so as to not be too pasty. Learn to trim your goatee with meticulous precision.

3} Long hair = be acne free, an appropriate weight and do not wear glasses. (Yes, I am breaking the last two rules, as I’m a little overweight and can’t afford contacts at the moment, and I am wrong.  I am working to change that.) Don’t dress outlandishly but be sure to dress with an edge. Don’t have a mustache, goatee or beard with it. It’s too much at that point (although, you can go for the Lemmy look but you’d best be bad-ass enough to pull it off). No gaming t-shirts or anything that screams “nerd”.  Far too many computer guys and geeks think long hair makes them cool; it doesn’t. Instead, it tends to give the impression they’re just too lazy to get a haircut.

There you have it, men.

I’d wish you the best of luck.

But you won’t really need it if you listen to me.

 

 

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