“… I wanna be, just like you, what you do, I want to…”






If one were to present me with survey results concerning the most important qualities women seek in men, my guess would be:


“Confidence” would be at the top.


With “Sense of Humor” directly (and closely) beneath it.




Now, I’ve already discussed the importance of a sense of humor.


Along with what exactly is meant when women mention/request such.


[It is, in fact, different than how men commonly employ the term.]


Therefore, I’ll clarify the quality that alights upon the pinnacle of so many wish lists.




For ease of understanding, I’ll break it down into a simple formula:


D * (S + C) = Confidence


{D}ecisiveness (in our context) is the ability to determine – and settle upon – a positive course of action with quickness sans excessive input [meaning minimal or no input] from others.



{S}urety of Action (in our context) is the belief that one’s own course, activity or behavior is the best possible option to achieve one’s related goal.



{C}ertainty of Capabilities (in our context) is the faith one has in one’s own talents and/or skills relevant to the current goal or obstacle, as the case may be.




You, dear reader, can see how the formula works.


More importantly, you’ll notice which among them is the most important factor.




Notice, it multiplies all other factors combined.




See, women, being unstable at their very core¹, find decisiveness to be an incredibly necessary palliative to their existential suffering.


Not forgetting (as the other factors demonstrate), that acts and deeds speak louder than words.


As a side note, this is also why men who are quick to – or frequently do – apologize repel women; regular apologies demonstrate a dearth of the aforementioned qualities that comprise “confidence”.




Thus, “confidence” – the three in one item it is – remains perched high.


And, if eagles were able:


Wearing a smirk.




[ ¹ = Indeed, menstruation itself is a physical manifestation of the tumultuous existence they lead; the body is literally breaking down and reforming monthly. ]







7 Responses to ““… I wanna be, just like you, what you do, I want to…””

  1. […] “… I wanna be, just like you, what you do, I want to…” […]

  2. As an awkward bookish young lad of 18 I had a couple of beauties who expressed great interest in me. Both of them were swooped by guys who were not very bright but were very decisive.

    Neither ended well; lives burnt to the ground. Cold comfort that they (much) later expressed their regret at not getting with me. They’re too old so no interest now. Even if attraction was still there … knowing the deal, I also know any love they had for me would never match their 5 minutes of Alpha. And I expect Fun in exchange for Comfort. So I must leave them be in their cold, dead ashes.

    Decisiveness, as insigtfully formulated above, is the chief multiplier in Confidence. It separates Alpha from Beta like the Atlantic separates America and Europe. But an 18 year old boy has no life experience; his Surety and Certainty are based on vapour. So his Confidence has a numerical value of Zero.

    Girls chasing smoke.

    • JD,

      Unless he’s been involved in sports for some/much of that time.

      Which acts as a tangible, easily understood metric for accomplishment and abilty.

      Hence, the reason “jocks get girls”.


      • Good thing I played sports throughout my education until college (when ROTC was my “sport”).

        I can see why men push their boys into sport, even if unconsciously. Not to mention the fact that it keeps their boys fit without making them necessarily “work out” (except when they do, read: conditioning).


      • Sure, absolutely. Same as the local garage/bar band.

        Still, most of them have no future in those endeavours. In the moment, Alpha as Fuck. Way more Al Bundys than Tim Tebows in the end.

        I’ve certainly observed – not without chagrin – that those 5 Minutes can power a hell of a long ride.

  3. Dizziness? Time to repay the pleasure I’ve had, reading your work.
    Short version: it could be Orthostatic Intolerance. What’s good about that, is that it can be determined with a “tilt table test”.
    Many more details upon demand.
    Keep up the good work.

    • Klaus,

      Glad you enjoyed reading.

      Thanks for the kind words and encouragement to continue.

      Also, I appreciate the offer of help re: my dizziness.

      Fortunately, it ended up being an inner ear infection.

      [Thanks be to God it wasn’t worse.]

      All the best to you and yours,


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