“I can tell you’re trouble but I still want a taste…”

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Female reader ► @PDGumshoe ◄ asks:

 

1} What’s the difference between how men and women value physical attractiveness?

 

2} How does that valuation expose people to being hurt? 

 

While the first question has, in some way, shape or form been answered many times by many different bloggers, I’ll answer it regardless.

 

I was asked directly, after all.

 

The difference between how men and women value physical attractiveness is a little more difficult to see, these days, as an increasing number of women struggle to be more mannish in their (witnessed) actions and behaviors.

 

However, like so many façades of modernity, it quickly falls away.

 

 

 

First, let’s mention how each sex generally defines “physical attractiveness” as embodied by their opposite.

 

“Physical attractiveness”, to men, is generally a certain waist to hip ratio, the presence of anatomic symmetry and other fertility/health cues such as clear skin and long, healthy hair.

 

“Physical attractiveness”, to women, is generally indications of strength and durability, i.e. solid musculature, height (for intimidation/dominance purposes) and facial hair to primaly indicate sexual maturity; anatomic symmetry is also important, although still somewhat aesthetic in value.

 

That’s sufficient for our purposes.

 

Now, lets answer the first question posed.

 

 

 

Men, on the whole, primarily value physical attractiveness since it is comprised of – as stated – strong indicators of a specific female’s fertility.

 

This is foremost because, historically, men have both defended and provided for themselves.

 

Thus, by process of elimination, successfully creating progeny is the only Truly basic drive they can’t complete on their own.

 

Therefore, physical attractiveness holds the importance it does.

 

 

 

As for females, now that the state (in modern, Western nations) has defended and provided for women, physical attractiveness – as an aesthetic – has moved up the importance ladder.

 

However, this is temporary (at best) and easily knocked off its rung.

 

In fact, it’s more of an indulgence by high-status, comfortable women than any actual trend within the sex, itself.

 

Rank and file women still default to defender/provider cues, on the whole, since – apart from the flicker of a candle’s flame the wealth and abundance of modernity is in human history – they have been crucial in female survival.

 

As a de facto and/or practical difference:

 

A male’s physical attractiveness is little more than a door to his opportunity.

 

A female’s physical attractiveness is her opportunity. 

 

Onto the second question:

 

“How does that valuation expose people to being hurt?”

 

 

 

This question is – by far – the better of the two and I’m compelled to say it’s one I’ve honestly never seen asked.

 

It’s honestly a bittersweet joy to answer.

 

As for female exposure to harm due to the valuation:

 

It certainly increases her odds of entering a tangled relationship with a narcissist or a man with serious rage issues.

 

But, even then, it’s still largely innocuous as an actual, physical danger.

 

[Anecdotally, I’m a very physically imposing man yet I’ve never once struck a woman beyond her bedroom requests.]

 

Its danger, however, lies more in emotional and temporal damage.

 

A woman may endure more infidelity and waste more time with him than she otherwise would.

 

 

 

Men, on the other hand, suffer immensely from this valuation.

 

It opens more doors to horror than I could possibly type here.

 

(See the title of this post, as it – like all my titles/posts – was carefully chosen.)

 

The more attractive the woman, the more bad behavior a man will tolerate.

 

As an aside, this is also why women believe men like “bitches”.

 

We don’t.

 

We like smoking-hot women.

 

We just put up with their shit more readily (and foolishly), it pains me to say.

 

I could continue describing the pits of suffering into which men would willing jump, but Leo Tolstoy put it best, in his work The Kreutzer Sonata:

 

“It is amazing how complete is the delusion that beauty is goodness.”

 

To which I add:

 

…and how eternal it remains.

 

 

 

 

 

7♦