“They’re neither moral nor majority”

9♥

 

 

I normally try to avoid trendy topics, but in this instance I’ll make an exception.

 

Actually, I’ll make an exception within an exception by giving actionable advice.

 

While most will be pumping even more mind-numbing Netflix and other forms of nigh-on-satanic digital heroin into their nervous systems in the coming weeks, I offer alternatives – because I, unlike them, care about you.

 

 

 

Thus, in the wake of what is now considered a pandemic, permit me to give some (unrequested) actionable advice should quarantines progress in stringency:

 

1} Unplug your television. You don’t need to break it or perform any expensive, iconoclastic-signaling nonsense such as that, but unplug it. Make it that much harder for you to watch it; render it more difficult for you to turn it on in favor of other – more productive – activities.

 

2} Go clean out your car and perform basic maintenance. Wherever it’s parked is very likely to be more than six feet from people so you won’t catch anything except the trash collection that’s been proliferating on your floorboards for quite some time.

 

3} Don’t have a car (or even if you do)? Clean your place. Don’t lie; you live somewhere. Vacuum; wash the windows; sweep; mop. You may be stuck there a while so make confinement that much more pleasant.

 

4} Do bodyweight exercises; yoga; stretches; walk around your yard (if you have some land). There’s exactly zero reasons you can’t go online and create a complete routine to do three or more times a week for 45 minutes each time.

 

5} Start writing emails. Contact folks you feel would be good candidates for reconnection or solidify friendships you already have. Germs won’t be transmitted thusly.

 

6} Learn a few crock pot/slow cooker recipes. If you don’t have one, go buy one while you can. Broke? Try thrift stores. You’ll be amazed how healthy you can eat on very little money and on meager supplies.

 

7} Make use of 24 hour stores in your area. If you work 9/5, nap if you must, but shop at 0200 regardless. Should you acclimate yourself to a weekly trip, I promise you’ll never go back to your old ways of shopping.

 

8} If you’re blessed enough to have a family or decent roommates, play board games. Break ’em out and put them to use (Note: not Monopoly, as that’s basically divorce in a box).

 

9} Hit that pile of “to be read” books you’ve neglected for far too long already. Don’t have one? Search for Project Gutenberg online and download some classics for free. Read them on your phone or tablet. I’ve a beat-up, used Nook that I’ve read everything from Dracula to The Insidious Fu-Manchu – for free, legally.

 

10} Lastly, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t plug table-top role-playing games. If you trust your friends to not attend a la the Red Death, invite them over and learn one together. PDF’s can be bought online or found free. Many of which use standard playing cards or dice that can be found in the board games you have around the house, too. Just do a bit of research.

 

 

 

That said, here’s things not to do that I have unwisely done in self-imposed exile:

 

1} Don’t drink enough whiskey to shit blood.

 

2} Don’t alienate friends and family by ignoring calls and messages.

 

3} Don’t start indulging your emotional bulimia online by starting a blog and writing incessantly for years for an audience small enough to fit in a high-school auditorium.

 

[OK, the last of the “don’ts” was a joke since I’ve met some great folks that way but understand it’s still laborious and financially unprofitable.]

 

Now, don’t say nobody loves you.

 

Because I just proved I do.

 

Stay well and healthy,

 

A♠

 

9♥

11 Responses to ““They’re neither moral nor majority””

  1. Great post ♠.

    Rest assured that the value of your blog / work cannot be measured monetarily, and the audience, while small, is deeply grateful. And don’t forget: a high school auditorium-full is still more than most people ever reach or positively influence in their lifetime.

    I’m not a religious man, but I’m reminded of this:

    Narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it. – Matthew 7:14

    (I’ll stop before I give you a Messiah Complex)

    • 5k40,

      I’m honored, truly.

      Your kind words and loyal readership mean more than you know and more than I can accurately express.

      And no worries as to a “messiah complex”.

      Even if I were worthy of it (which I’m not), I wouldn’t want the job. 😉

      All the best to you & yours,

      A♠

  2. A♠,

    It appears daily there’ll be a different world waiting on the other side of all this. I don’t know if it will be good or bad (probably the usual combination of both), but a different hand will be dealt to play with.

    Man, I’ll take it.

    The great illusion woven over our consciousness by black magick money like the Fremont Street Experience is about to collapse into the street. That’s what my gut is telling me anyway.

    This is all great advice and well underway at the JD Bunker. Keep in touch, will ya?

    Best,
    JD

    • JD,

      Glad to hear you found it useful! And I def agree that this is a turning point.

      I’ll certainly stay in touch.

      All the best to you & yours,

      A♠

  3. Villa la Lange Says:

    Ace,

    You still remain one of the greats. Been reading your blog for a while and am always happy when I see a post in my RSS feed.

    • Villa,

      Deeply and sincerely appreciated.

      I say this often but I mean it every, single time:

      Your kind words mean more than you’d guess.

      And it’s comments such as this that keep me writing for you all.

      All the best to you & yours,

      A♠

  4. So, is it okay to shit my pants now or not?

    I mean, it’s 2020 and I’ve been waiting for almost five years.

    Wald

  5. Curry Rice Says:

    I’ve been reading your blog for years. I just wanna say thanks for being there.

    Greetings from Nairobi.

    • Curry Rice,

      Thanks a million for your loyal readership and kind words.

      As I often say:

      It’s men like you that keep me writing.

      And thanks for the shout out from Nairobi.

      I’m sure the Kenyan countryside is gorgeous.

      All the best to you & yours,

      A♠

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