“Trust me and take my hand; when the lights go out, you’ll understand…
↓
An easy way to get a handle on the bare bones of gender goals is to keep this crude but helpful summation in mind:
Men need to prove how much pain they can dish out.
Women need to prove how much pain they can take.
As I’ve stated previously, men need strength.
Women need resilience.
Now, modernity gives little opportunity for (not to mention denies permission to) either gender to display such sans criticism.
Sports are getting safer and the daily obstacles/tribulations of life must be eradicated.
The unanticipated problem, however, is there exists a deeply ingrained need for both genders to display and observe displays.
Therefore, stopgap (and rather ineffective) methods have been created and popularized.
Loosely stated, they are:
Video games for men.
BDSM and cutting for women.
It’s no surprise that both 50 Shades of Grey and cutting [by which I really mean self-harm, in general] are extremely popular (although one of the two is, at least ostensibly, viewed as negative).
The growing popularity of the two was to be expected as they are ways for women to state they are empowered (by choosing and controlling the source of harm) while they are actually communicating how much punishment they can take (read: how resilient they are).
Other dark forms of female power displays are:
Martyr complexes.
And “dating assholes”.
Both of those show, with a façade of humility, that said woman is exceptionally resilient.
In less prosperous/more dangerous times, there was little need to utilize such action to provide evidence.
One’s life experiences were plainly visible and known as communities were nowhere near as atomized.
This is the reason the preponderance of fairy tales, which originated in those turbulent days, revolve around the put-upon young woman, in terrible circumstances, that finds her prince.
A prince that, due to the woman’s proven resilience, finds her all the more attractive for it.
Realize, the prince sees her, rightly so, as more appreciative.
Less demanding.
More cheerful.
And hardier of spirit than his countless other options.¹
Lastly, a wise prince knows:
A woman is far less inclined to prepare a feast of drama if she’s been force-fed it for a few years.
Ω
¹ = The extremely popular blogger Judgey Bitch is, in reality, one of those women. She’s shared her personal history, many times.
80-Proof Oinomancy 
January 28, 2015 at 2:53 am
[…] “Trust me and take my hand; when the lights go out, you’ll understand… […]
January 28, 2015 at 3:01 am
Brilliant as always mate.
The female connection with resilience is a means of demonstrating worthiness of investment. A man, especially a high value man, doesn’t want to invest in a woman who will fall apart when the going gets tough. He needs to know that she, and any children she bears, will survive, and ultimately, thrive.
Can anyone say Cinderella?
January 28, 2015 at 3:05 am
“Brilliant as always mate.”
Many thanks for the compliment, Donal.
(Truth be told, I thought I was losing my touch.
Last few have garnered no comments or even likes.)
“Can anyone say Cinderella?”
And I agree with your words.
Not to mention, Cinderella is but one of many.
All the best to you, DG.
January 28, 2015 at 11:21 am
The lack of a comment or a “like” does not indicate a lack of thought spurred by a post or the lack of someone appreciating it.
Do you doubt God’s existence in your head because you do not hear a voice in your head telling you he died for your sins and he loves you? I didn’t think so.
And if you really must know – your most recent posts either are so simple I’ve already missed the point or are layered such that I need to read them a couple times before I get the meaning or some of it; at least, enough to comment on.
Wald
January 28, 2015 at 2:39 pm
Ace, I’ve been pretty busy so I couldn’t pay them much attention. Also, sometimes I have nothing more to say than what has already been said.
January 28, 2015 at 4:49 am
Women cut themselves because it intensifies the drama of their uselessness & pampered existence
Only privileged pampered women surrounded by hordes of orbiting men require cutting to get any drama out of their pussy pass lives …
Also huge hordes of gaps in your text isnt helping you in the readability stakes … lol
Addendum: Donal Graem is a raging vagina … ie his entire blogs dedicated to pedestalising women … lmao
Typical pedestalising christosphere fundie …
January 28, 2015 at 5:15 am
Some brilliant examples are tribal rites of passage. In a particular tribe (though I forget the name, if anyone can help me here) the boys and girls undergo rites of passage at 13. The boys whip each other with sticks and need to remain stoic. The girls get their faces scarified and need to remain stoic. Therefore, the boys are being tested on their strength, courage, endurance and pain tolerance. The girls are being tested on their emotional stability, endurance and pain tolerance. If a boy or girl breaks and cries during their rite, they have to wait another year, until they’re ready. Neither can have their own house, work among their peers or marry until they pass.
As far as BDSM goes, rough sex is fairly ordinary for humans. I’m confused by the fact we pretend to be “proper” and try and claim we always engage in gentle, awkward lovemaking under the sheets. The modern Western world is the only society to have so many hangups we need to pretend that hair pulling and biting and slapping are not part of normal sex.
January 28, 2015 at 5:21 am
“The modern Western world is the only society to have so many hangups we need to pretend that hair pulling and biting and slapping are not part of normal sex.”
Agreed 100%.
However, I consider none of the three things you mention as actual BDSM.
(Nor, I suspect, do you.)
Especially in light of sexual practices of the majority of life on this planet.
January 28, 2015 at 5:36 am
Depends how sharp the teeth are. For me the line starts at blood and deep bruising. For the typical “50 sheds of grey”* fangirl it seems to start at fantasizing about light bondage. Though how much of that is them trying to sound edgy and conformist at once and how much is honest “I really think this is serious”, I don’t know. There are far fewer masochists out there than folks would have you believe, though.
*”50 Sheds of Grey” is an actual parody book and, however short, its hilarious.
January 28, 2015 at 5:42 am
“Though how much of that is them trying to sound edgy and conformist at once and how much is honest ‘I really think this is serious’, I don’t know.”
Either way, my point is both made and supported.
They are signalling resilience.
To either match, or outpace, the herd.
“There are far fewer masochists out there than folks would have you believe, though.”
Perhaps it’s just the type of women I attract, but they’ve all liked it… very rough.
So which is correct, your information or my anecdotal evidence, is up for debate.
January 28, 2015 at 5:54 am
Makes you wonder how they signaled it before 50 sheds gave them permission to enjoy rough sex.
And I haven’t a clue which of us has a more proportionate sample of the population to work with. Though, following “choosy female” sexual theory, there’s a distinct possibility you just awaken something more aggressive and primal in most girls who like you. So they may not be like that for every man they fancy, but they feel compelled to be like that with you. Which isn’t really masochism, as before laying eyes on you they didn’t crave the pain. Then again, how many women secretly crave pain and just haven’t met someone believably strong to give it to them?
January 28, 2015 at 11:34 am
“Then again, how many women secretly crave pain and just haven’t met someone strong enough to give it to them.”
That’s a great quote.
I’d ask you both to take some time to read this thread:
http://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-43889.html
I’m insanely curious to see your thoughts. A poster Geomann180 among others, makes good points, but his truth(s) is not the ultimate senior truth like the above quotation is.
Wald
January 28, 2015 at 11:48 am
This post is particularly salient to the discussion as well.
http://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-43889-post-928432.html#pid928432
January 28, 2015 at 6:03 am
“Then again, how many women secretly crave pain and just haven’t met someone believably strong to give it to them?”
Even in this whiskey and Marlboro № 27 induced haze:
Two women that said damn near those exact words to me spring to mind.
So, anecdotal as it is, my guess is the truth leans closer to my side.
January 28, 2015 at 6:05 am
Possibly so.
January 28, 2015 at 6:13 am
“Possibly so.”
Looking like this
has an effect, I’m sure.
January 28, 2015 at 6:43 am
You see, that sort of a look actually has me questioning, again, whether it’s your mate pool.
Somewhere between redneck and metalhead is a bit of a niche (no offense intended, I’m sure you know what I mean). The girls who like you are going to be of a certain type right to begin with and then you’re going to be making them feel very differently to how bikers, bouncers or skinheads (their other favourites) make them feel. Women generally run in herds. And you look like the Alpha of a rocker chick’s herd. It would probably take you a lot longer to find a traditional Asian girl or a meek hippie girl who reacted the same way. Then again, why fish for minnows when you have perfect trout bait or vice versa?
Plus, Alphas can often “convert” certain women outside their herd into part of the herd. If you look reliable and fun enough, you’ll get the odd hippie girl suddenly dressing like Joan Jet or a neo-Nazi in an effort to impress you and switch herds. But I probably don’t need to tell you that. Unsure if that would affect her sexual choices too, though, or if she’d just go along with it to impress you further.
January 28, 2015 at 6:50 am
“…no offense intended, I’m sure you know what I mean.”
None taken in the slightest.
I shared the photo to give you more information from which to draw.
I’ll respond in greater detail to your comment later.
January 28, 2015 at 12:19 pm
There’s no denying that there are dark elements of sexuality of both men and women that the average joe wouldn’t relish dealing with.
I increasingly find that old restraints placed on the sexuality of both sexes and the ceremony of courtship itself were in place as much for harmony among the sexes as they were in place to keep the dark parts beneath the surface, where they just might belong.
The law of unintended consequences never fails to impress.
_
It’s our loss, that we lack coming of age rituals for either man or woman and the institutions which used to help are in decline (charm schools, boy scouts, etc).
Though I can’t think of any good examples on the side of women, it’s why boxers and martial artists do not want for female attention in a way that famous men (even football players) aren’t able to enjoy. It’s part of the reason why military men are revered and were revered in ancient societies.
Wald
February 6, 2015 at 1:01 am
“I increasingly find that old restraints placed on the sexuality of both sexes and the ceremony of courtship itself were in place as much for harmony among the sexes as they were in place to keep the dark parts beneath the surface, where they just might belong.”
Great statement.
January 28, 2015 at 4:06 pm
Love 3 Days Grace. Picking up Matt Walst makes them better.
When they do trust you and take your hand, any point after that which you’d like to be rid of them is damn near impossible. A breakup with one of those women is a long time in happening and ruins them for a while after.
February 6, 2015 at 1:00 am
Sometimes I think you come here just for the music, Sean.
j/k
January 28, 2015 at 5:12 pm
Granted all I have to go off of is hip exercises meant to strengthen the core…but if a man has good muscle and technique in the hips and glutes shouldn’t it be powerful and most likely rough that the other stuff isn’t that important? Or is this more of her mental/emotional issues that she only feels something when she’s phyiscally hurt and the form doesn’t matter?
I can see with a lot of guys sitting around all the time and not working out those muscles…they would be weaker in those areas.
February 4, 2015 at 3:42 pm
Good post, Ace.
February 6, 2015 at 12:59 am
Thanks, Deti.
February 6, 2015 at 5:06 pm
[…] Men are made to dish out pain. Women are made to take it. […]
April 20, 2016 at 9:19 pm
[…] “Trust me and take my hand; when the lights go out, you’ll understand…” (Three Days Grace – Pain) […]
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