“…you feed it once and now it stays…”

 

 

 

 

 

A new, but ardent, reader writes:

 

“No matter how much better I get, there’s still this nagging feeling of ‘not yet, you still aren’t good enough.’

 

How do I get rid of it?”

 

 

 

[My response to him follows:]

 

I’ll keep it brief.

 

On a scale of 1-10, how much do you forgive the failings/shortcomings of others [1 least; 10 most]?

 

 

 

Now, how much do you forgive your own?

 

If the numbers differ (I strongly suspect they do, and you give yourself the lower of the two), why?

 

Regardless of the answer to “why”:

 

Stop.

 

[Although you still need to answer the question for your personal growth.]

 

Make them equal – to the best of your ability.

 

 

 

To do so, imagine being as unforgiving to others as you are to yourself.

 

How well do you think that will work out?

 

Exactly.

 

Thus, you should probably ease up on yourself a bit.

 

 

 

Remember, Christ (if you’re not Christian, this is still good advice) said:

 

Love others as you love yourself.

 

Not more than yourself.

 

Common error.

 

I made it for 30 years.

 

 

 

Anything else I say at this point will be uninformed noise.

 

So think on those questions.

 

 

 

All the best,

 

A♠

[Ace of Spades]

 

 

 

 

Ω

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6 Responses to ““…you feed it once and now it stays…””

  1. […] “…you feed it once and now it stays…” […]

  2. A quick comment:

    I have seen healthy people who judge themselves harsher than others, but only since converting to Catholicism. Those who are able to, after confession, drop all feelings of such and move forward to amend their ways. If they can’t drop thode feelings, they become ensnared. If they can’t use the guilt and anger at their imperfections to amend their lives, they walk in deep rutted circles of self pity or undertake an eternal pushing of rocks up the hill.

    From what I’ve seen, getting it right is rare, and might be the stuff saints are made of

    • Our deacon gave a homily on that very topic. Resentment falls under the ‘failing to do’ aspect of repentance and keeps us from spiritual growth.

      Once you repent of the sin and are forgiven…drop the resentment too.

    • “From what I’ve seen, getting it right is rare, and might be the stuff saints are made of.”

      Brilliant, Chad.

      Simply brilliant.

  3. […] “…you feed it once and now it stays…”  (Metallica – Until it sleeps) […]

  4. […] “…you feed it once and now it stays…”  (Metallica – Until it sleeps) […]

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