Archive for June, 2020

“She stabs her dolls and she buries them 6 feet deep…“

Posted in Uncategorized on June 12, 2020 by A♠







Sex sells.


It’s everywhere.


With good reason, I grant you, but its omnipresence is tiresome considering so few seem to truly understand its actual complexity.




Yes, we all know where “babies come from”.


The ‘sphere has discussed its bonding power (to a twisted point).


And the power it has over men, specifically, has often been addressed, although at a mostly surface level.


Before we go further, permit me to say:


I realize using the “number rating system” for female attractiveness is a bit gauche; I’ll employ it here for clarity at one point, regardless.


Since, let’s be honest, men (and even women) fully grasp and follow it easily.




Now, I’ll cover a few things that I believe have been far too unspoken in these parts.


1} There are two separate but equal paths to power: sex and violence. Each is given to a gender as a means to their particular ends. The promise – and judicious use – of both is crucial to success. All art and literature circle those fraternal twins in awe and obeisance for those very reasons.


2} When sex occurs, both parties think themselves conquerors. Both may be correct but one always, definitely is. Motivations to that moment matter and decide the victor, especially if there’s only one. Ideally, both are predator and prey. This, sadly, is not always the case.


3} Victory in the sexual realm has a cost. Both parties surrender something; a price is paid. Only the currency differs. Women lose value to the next man in their lives; men lose the uniqueness that the next woman offers (at the very least).


4} Casual sex is as much a ludicrous fallacy as casual violence. Both take significant, long term tolls on the mental health of the perpetrator. Dehumanization of others stems from both and dehumanizing others increases the individuals loneliness by orders of magnitude.




The following is a bit too much to make a bullet point, so I’ll try to elucidate it outside the preceding list.


I’ve a few thoughts.


I’m unsure how many sexual conquistadors would agree but I’ll posit it nonetheless.


The hottest women (≥8) are bad in bed.


They labor (or, more accurately given context, fail to labor) under the impression that their attractiveness is enough to carry them through a sexual encounter.


[NAXALT, of course]


Their belief is patently untrue.


A distant, aloof lover is no lover, at all.




I’ve found – in my comparatively limited experience to countless (online) Lotharios – ideal is sex is had with a 6-7 (an occasional 8 may be an exception).


Such women are attractive enough to generate arousal but not so hot as to feel arrogant in their desirability.


Thus, they make for eager yet appealing lovers.




Lastly, I’ll address a topic near to me:


“Crazy girls fuck best.”


Whew, boy do they.


Why is that?


They’ve so little self-worth that they’ll gladly debase themselves in any way necessary to be the victor in the sexual act.


They think themselves nothing so they believe there’s nothing to lose.


What’s the problem with that, a man may ask?


You’ll find out in short order, my friend.


I promise you.


Because, as one of the solipsistic gender:


If she thinks so lowly of herself—


You’re so far beneath her as to be underground.



“How do I figure out this mess that’s me?“

Posted in Uncategorized on June 9, 2020 by A♠




In 2004, I attached my laptop to my television using an “s” video cable; I attached my stereo to my laptop with a “y” adapter.


This had the internet and all my digital music running through both my stereo and my television (which I didn’t watch, really, beyond videos I’d acquired).


Every friend I had that saw it was blown away.


I was complimented by their reactions but did nothing more.


Imagine my crushing disappointment when – a decade later – I’m working for minimum wage in a Target selling Roku and “smart” televisions.




Also in 2004, I was playing D&D with friends whereupon – during a break – I mentioned a hugely successful television program could be low-fantasy so long as it:


1} Featured the unexpected deaths of protagonists.


2} Had the majority of its budget spent on costumes rather than effects since it’s atmosphere that keeps people engaged with such things.


Imagine my complete lack of surprise and utter sense of loss when Game of Thrones became a global phenomenon.




Three years ago I had the idea to start a video series called “The Dad You Never Had”; meant to aid the innumerable young men that would relate to the title more than words could express.


Imagine my self-criticism when I heard of “Dad, how do I…?” and its success.




This year, I split with the only woman I’d ever dated that kept the majority of promises she made me.


I did so in the hopes that we’d each be able to move in healthier, more positive directions.


Such has manifested for neither of us.




I recently took up gardening – in the midst of all of the chaos – to find purpose while acquiring a new skill.


Only to find everything dead and rotting despite my best efforts.




Increasingly, my friends have been calling me to bemoan the state of things.


I suppose with expectations I’d give them comforting encouragement.


My only response is:


Load your rifle.


It’s the only option now.




Every morning I make my bed.


Every day I focus on the few and little things within my control.


Every night I hear the black dog baying; calling forth my every error, misstep and failure.


An all too familiar cycle.




Ironically, I have myriad messages and memories that prove I’ve helped plenty of men move on to better places in life.


Lately, I find myself wishing—


I could be one of them.